i feel like im going crazy. gonna erase some links. none added though. my list of friends are dwindling. i really dunno who considers me a fren anymore. all the hostility ttz going around. and i feel that its all against me somehow. by a small group of ppl. some of them will stumble upon this page. some wun bother. which im quite happy. cuz i dun bother anymore. shant bother. wasting my time and effort and things. concentrate on my studies. sometimes. i dun feel like going to RJ. not at all. juz throw away the idea and flush it right down the toilet bowl. even if i do get the 6 points which im gonna study super hard to try to achieve. my sister is in RJ. and she is undergoing a very vicious cycle i muz admit. studying and all. its taking a toll on her. i hardly see her. although im hardly at home myself. when she's at home. she's cooped up in her room. studying i presume. she's so hardworking. im so not. how to survive in an environment like that? i know that probably most likely ill end up in RJ as all ppl say. but. do i really want to go there? im sick of this kinda environment. the ppl. some ppl ( myself included of course ) think that they are doing the right thing. and are so bloody stubborn and are unwilling to change. it pisses ppl off. helping doesnt help. u juz get pushed off anyway. i hope things can and WILL change for the better. i can only pray.
i dun like this feeling. i was quite happy that i was having a half day. break from triple s. its bad to have high expectations. they crumble. juz like the cookie does. no difference at all. maybe i should have taken diff choices. in the end. stoned for a LONG time. before going town to meet timmo to watch T3. most productive part of my day. ( after the 1 hour of maths) the rare PE lesson was filled up by some volleyball. which aint that bad. but with half of them kbing about it. i cant do much.
T3 was cool. the front phrase too. about we all thinking we can change our fate and destiny when we cant. something like that lar. there are things that u can change. but not ur fate and destiny i guess. dun believe in such things anw. but. they do exist. i figure. talking with timmo was nice. i guess. hoping to get him to start studying. which would be wonderful. go check his blog out yeah. my links are fixed. new add. and deleted ppl. oh. i tink ill add.. seehong! and titus. hm. gd idea
the leader of the band is tired
and his eyes are growing old
but his blood runs through my instrument
and his song is in my soul
my life has been a poor attempt
to imitate the man
im just a living legacy
to the leader of the band....
one of my fav oldies. hm. if u read this. pls sign gb. lemme know who reads this. thx!
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